We’ve all joked about the idea of a hall pass. It’s that hypothetical agreement with your partner where you allow each other to step out on your relationship for one night with a different person. And that person is normally a movie star or athlete or musician or some other unattainable figure who you will likely never meet in real life. It’s a safe fantasy to indulge in.
But you know who gets overlooked in the hall pass discussion? Book boyfriends. As much as I love my celebrity crush list, the list of book boyfriends I would use my hall pass on is way, way longer. So in the spirit of fun and make-believe and all things romance, here is a list of hall pass-worthy book boyfriends, guaranteed to flood your basement.
March from the Spotless series by Camilla Monk
Those who like a bit of excitement in their lives or who have a James Bond fetish would be wise to choose March. This hitman has a complicated past and present — it’s part of the reason why he only goes by one name and works as an assassin. But do you really need someone’s full name or life story if all you want is one memorable night? Nope. And that’s why March is an excellent hall pass contender. This part-English, part-South African hottie is a consummate professional. He’ll show up on time in a suit, and be equal parts polite and charming. And when you’re ready to take things to the bedroom, he won’t disappoint. All the dangerous missions he’s on keep him in tip-top shape. Plus, his chiseled torso sports the perfect amount of chest chair. Yum! And if for some reason you encounter an unsavory character on your date, you can rest assured March will take care of it. You won’t even notice that he’s packing heat until he’s eliminated the threat of danger. He’s that suave. The safest place you’ll ever be is in March’s company. And when you’re finished, you won’t have to worry about him spilling the beans about your sexy encounter. He’ll keep things private. Because that’s March: sexy, discreet, and lethal.
Michael Phan from The Kiss Quotient by Helen Hoang
For anyone crushing on Daniel Henney, Michael Phan is your man. Daniel’s doppelgänger is an aspiring fashion designer who works as an escort. That means he’s got loads of personality game in addition to being dynamite in bed. He’s also a total sweetheart who pays attention to the woman in his company. Are you super nervous that you finally worked up the nerve to use your hall pass? No problem. Ensuring you’re comfortable before you do anything physical is his prerogative — and what sets him apart from lesser guys. He’ll chat with you, watch a movie with you, take you out for ice cream, anything to set you at ease. And when you’re warmed up and ready, he will blow your mind. In his free time, he practices martial arts, so you know he’s got physical prowess. Plus, he loves going down, and he’s damn good at it. Added bonus: he’s one hell of a cook. That means the morning after, you’ll wake up to a delicious meal.
Joshua Templeman from The Hating Game by Sally Thorne
Full disclosure: As hot as Josh Templeman is, he’s a tough personality. He may be a tall, tanned and muscled drink of water, but he’s also standoffish, curt and brutally sarcastic. In other words, very, very prickly. It’s part of his charm though. The one person he’s sweet to is his lady Lucy, and even I have to admit that’s pretty damn adorable. But sometimes when you’re considering using a hall pass, you’re not interested in a meeting of the minds. You just want a damn good romp in the sack. And if the love scene in The Hating Game is anything to go by, Josh is worth his weight in gold when it comes to a mind-blowing session under the sheets. The man dedicates a chunk of time every day to working out. He does weights AND cardio (literal two-a-days). He also maintains a meticulously healthy diet. You know what that means, don’t you? Heroic stamina. He can go and go and go like the Energizer Bunny. All you have to do is lie back, hold on to something, and enjoy the ride. Rawr.
Matt Denbridge from No Cure Required by Stefanie Simpson
Matt Denbridge is one of my favorite cinnamon rolls ever. He’s an intimidating guy on the surface: tall, dark, muscular, brooding good looks, killer English accent. He works in security and is armed with a scowl that would make a concrete statue wilt. But get to know him, and he’s a gigantic softie. Plus, he is one hell of a dom. Not only does he blow your mind in the bedroom with an arsenal of sexy tools, but his aftercare is off-the-charts nurturing. So if you’re in the mood to spend your hall pass on someone who respectfully takes control in the bedroom while fulfilling all your carnal desires, he’s the one for you.
Zayne from Sext by Penny Wylder
If you’re in the mood for someone who will spend an entire evening catering to you, Zayne is your guy. This doorman by day, sex god by night is a stand-up guy in every sense of the word. Blessed with blond hair and piercing blue eyes that make him look like a Norse god, Zayne will never forget to hold the door for you. It’s his job after all. He’ll take you out for a drink at a cool bar, where you’ll flirt like crazy until the sexual tension is so thick that you HAVE to tear his clothes off. As gentlemanly as this jacked AF hottie is, he’s also not afraid to put a-holes in their place. If a guy is hassling you, he’ll tell him off. And if the offending dude refuses to back off, Zayne will punch him out and send him on his way. And then he’ll take you home to his cozy apartment and rock your world.
Calvin from Roomies by Christina Lauren
This Irish street busker is perfect for anyone who likes their men musical AND muscular. This street musician-turned-Broadway star spends hours upon hours composing music and rehearsing, which means he’s hardworking and passionate… and has limber fingers. But what’s most endearing about this guy is that he’s modest in his talents. He’s a gifted guitarist, but he works hard. He walks around his apartment shirtless, not concerned with unimportant things like fashion. When he answers the door to welcome you in for your hall pass date, he will be likely be bare chested and playing his guitar. He’ll serenade you, then charm you by chatting in that panty-dropping Irish accent. And then he’ll escort you to the bedroom and show you just how good he is with his hands.
Michael Zorn from A Good Man by Rosanna Leo
This Canadian TV home renovation expert will fulfill all your cavewoman desires. With his vast knowledge of homebuilding, demolition, and renovation, he can literally build you a shelter from the ground up. But his appeal is more than just primal. He’s a sweetheart too, always willing to offer up a joke or a sweet story to lighten the mood. He is the ideal hall pass hunk for anyone who wants to play hard, then enjoy a steamy night in. What does an evening with Michael entail? Well, he’ll probably let you help out on the set of his latest home renovation episode. When you’re all sweaty and dirty, he’ll offer to clean you up in his spa shower. After soaping up every inch of your body, he’ll drop to his knees and show you just how much he appreciates all your hard work. And then he’ll finish you off in his bed. Because at the core, he’s a simple man who lives to house you, protect you, and satisfy you, even if it’s just for one night.