Modern Love Poetry: I Have Visited Here Everyday by Shrutee Choudhary

[Note from Frolic: We’re so excited to welcome poet Shrutee Choudhary back to the site. She’s sharing more of her breathtaking modern love poems with us!]

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i have visited here everyday

for six months

i have listened to their entire music

collection, exchanged a variety of my smiles

with different strangers.

i know all the anecdotes the waiters

hold close. i know what brings them joy, i know

how many members there are in their families and each of their small towns. i have a table to

my name now, i can blindly walk towards it, i have even counted the steps that lead to it.

i have visited here everyday

for six months

in the hopes to recreate my first visit, when you

sat across from me on a table for one, a few feet apart, i sat alone too, facing you. i felt my skin without feeling it with my hand, simply because you looked at me.

the world wouldn’t be able to handle

the tremors caused from our eyes meeting, so we avoided it, as much as we could. a new smile was born that day, one i still don’t give away to strangers. one that i keep for you. it anticipates

your arrival each day.

i bury my nose in a book but my mind

rummages through faces

passing by the window

my heart beats to “are you here yet”

repeatedly, seventy two times

a minute.

i have visited here everyday

for six months

but why haven’t you?

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two poems

1. sometimes i think

you aren’t far away at all

i can imagine

being next to you

each evening

when the sun slips under

a blanket to rest with

the horizon

it’s like returning

to your arms

after a long day

and falling into

a deep sleep

2. spending a simple day

with you

is an adventure doused

in golden sun rays

and suddenly, every day

is a Sunday

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they ask me

how long it takes me

to write a poem

it only takes

the length of

a breath to

summon

your memories

after which

the words, they soar

then they drizzle

they rain

and just like that

there is a downpour.

lately i find myself slipping

into a dream before i even

fall asleep

and no matter the storyline

you’re always next to me

even in your silhouette

i can see you smile

against a cinematic

sunset as our backdrop

and the rest of the world

watches us be, expectantly

mere spectators

to our soliloquies

as we struggle to speak

our hearts.